Ever wondered why your plans haven’t quite gone as you wanted them to? You’ve been watching your ambitions for too long and not able to enjoy living it yet? Are you a future-orientated person and just need to know where you are headed? If so, then I think you might enjoy and gain some benefit from what I have compiled together in this handy little post.
As I have been studying life coaching now for over a year, I feel that it is about time I shared some real practical stuff I’ve learnt about effective goal-setting and combined it with my understanding of personal development from previous years of studying therapies, to help you plan your route to success. Find out why your plan is really on hold…
1. Know Your Values
Your values are one of the most fundamental elements to consider when planning your success. Yet, how can we truly know our values?
Our values are what makes us the individuals we are and contribute massively to our everyday decisions. For example, one of my values is: “Keeping to a Routine”
With this as a primary value, you can imagine that dates and times of stuff I’m doing on a particular day will naturally have greater meaning to me, potentially becoming an obstacle, if the actions I need to take to achieve my goal challenge my precious routine.
There are many different kinds of values- some we have in common with people and others are completely unique. Think about what is important to you. What really matters? Family, Money, Security, Being around others, Being in Control, Having a strict diet plan, Exercising regularly, Being Outside…
This is just to get the cogs turning, but now have a think and see if you can write down 10 values and highlight your top 3 primary values- values which you obide by on a daily basis. These are the ones which, if you don’t understand, in terms of working them into your plan, can actually become regular obsticles to you seeing your plans through to where you want.
Remember, you need to know what makes you float, before you take to the water.
2. Know What is Stopping You
On my coaching course with The Coaching Academy, this was referred to as your “limiting beliefs”. Unlike your Values, these are associated with what we can’t do, yet are also potential obstacles to us achieving that big picture.
Once again, here’s my example: “I am an Introvert”
Although this is quite a true statement with my own meaning: “I prefer to express myself through writing, recording, music and I will do anything to avoid face-to-face like the plague.”
However, I am also aware of how limiting the meaning behind this belief can be. In order to challenge this, I must disect the meaning and construct a more positive one- changing this “limiting belief” into a personal Value:
“Beyond my introverted core, I do have many contributing qualities I have developed to enable me to behave in a more extroverted manner- I can be extroverted when I need to be.”
By opening up the original close statement, I have thought about times when I am not being an introvert and therefore able to confirm that this is not something that will always hold me back.
Like values, limiting statements we tell ourselves can work well with how we function without need for challenge- to an extent. For example “I will never leave my home town.” This belief may be all well and good, unless the very thing you want to do is non-existant in your own county/state. Then what?…
It’s factors like these, which allow gaps to form in your plan and push back any targets and goals you want to meet in the future, causing you to wonder why you haven’t got that thing you really want. So I ask of you: think of 5 limiting beliefs you can hear yourself saying on a regualr basis- how would you challenge them? What is stopping you?
What are those weights within your feathers which you can afford to shed?
3. What Does Success Mean to You?
And finally, what does success mean to you?
This is critically important to understand now, at this point in the planning, because if you can’t answer this then how will you know that you have been successful?
Whether success is passing a test, qualifying for your dream career, financial stability or starting a family, the best way to get down to it is to analyse that feeling of success. When was the last time you achieved something? How did you feel? What was it about achieving that thing that made you feel this way?
The reason I beleive this to be important is that, as living, feeling human beings, it is most often a feeling itself which drives us to success. Another branch of from this would be to consider what motivates you to be successful in this particular achievement that you seek so badly? How can you motivate yourself?
Well, you could start by writing down (oh yes, I know, I’m going to give you writer’s cramp by then end of this) what success means to you. How did you get there? And most importantly, what did it feel like?
Now you know how to float, watch from the water and not from the bank.
I hope this helps. A follow-up post will shortly follow…
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